Better Offer?

The things I do – whilst waiting for a better offer!

“Man Drawers And Scampi Fries”

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OK, so I have got my round in and we are all back round the table picking up from where we left off.  Mr Plenty is still pulling faces and talking with a very camp actor’s voice.  This sets Nutty off again, because her boyfriend is also an actor, and like me, he is not a bit camp.  However, having seen a photograph of the two of us on Facebook recently, neither of us can claim we don’t pull faces!  We just don’t do it like Mr Plenty.

Our conversation is temporarily halted whilst we all breathe in what can only be described as a foul smell.  The only trouble is, the smell is emanating from a bar snack and one has to wonder how this product ever made it off the production line in the first place.  But it did, around thirty years ago.

I don’t mean that this particular packet was thirty years old, despite its odour; I mean I remember this snack hitting the shops in the early 1980s.

"Scampi Fries"

Tasty snack with a disgusting odour!

Gagging over, it was back to our conversation, and somehow it turned to attacking me for keeping programmes and press cuttings from productions I have been a part of.  It all stemmed from She Who Must Be Obeyed telling everyone that I had not just one man drawer, but four.

And if you don’t know the significance of a man drawer, watch this routine by Michael McIntyre.

It’s true, I do keep press cuttings and programmes – they are all a part of my history and I like to refer to them from time to time.  Maybe that is something some people don’t understand and might call it clutter or hoarding things; never throwing things out, but I like to have them, and my ‘man drawers’ are where they live!

Wanting to shift the attention away from my drawers 😉 I started to tell everyone about this strange thing I’d seen earlier that day in one of the local department stores.  A woman was reclining in a chair having her facial hair removed by another woman who was using what appeared to be a piece of cotton.  She seemed to have one end between her teeth and was stretching the other ends across one of the eye brows of the woman.

I’m reliably informed, this is called Threading!  It looked a quite painful and lengthy process just to remove hair.  I wonder how effective it is – how long it lasts.  Ah well, I guess it beats the epilator.  I saw Nutty using one of those on holiday a couple of years ago and that looked really painful.  Can you imagine using that on your face?  The girls round the table wanted to try it out on the men.

I think the drinks were kicking in at this point!


Author: Better Offer

I am approaching my saga years (rapidly)! Correction, I have now reached my saga years! I am a thespian who has appeared in commercials and films and on TV, and love my time on stage but am extremely frustrated that I get most my work as an amateur. When not on stage I can be found walking the countryside, leading worship at my local church or running IT training courses and fixing PCs – just waiting for that better offer!

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